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hallmark holiday greetings

May 12, 2014

I miss you Jeanne Joyce Druery Burkenbach Shacochis O’Mailey. Everyday, all the time.  There wasn’t nearly enough time. I hadn’t even begun to live my life in a way that would have been cool for you like my kiddos and awesome dog you wouldn’t have been allergic to. My cool house that is near where you lived. All my cool tattoos you would have hated but thought were pretty. No more heavy sighing, no more arguing with me, no more yelling, no more falling short, no more not one damn thing because you are dead.

It will never stop being surprisingly horrific and confusing that you are dead. I am afraid I will always miss you so acutely that it is an actual pain somewhere inside that feels like a stomach-ache.

It seems impossible that I can and have just gone on living without you and I miss you madly everyday.

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