Guns, guns, guns, guns
Important news days are like a vortex that has the magnetic pull of a blackhole filled with naked Kardashians. I balance between wanting to know what is happening just like everyone else and the inabilit to process rapid gunfire, bombings, blood and violence. I don’t find any catharsis in watching the news unfold and the confirmation of getting the bad person cements no security in my head.
I turned on the computer and searched the bombing in Boston and clicked on the first link in google and then clicked on the link that had footage of the nighttime gunfight. You can hear the volley of shots back and forth, back and forth and then suddenly it is a stream of gunfire. Continuous, multiple, too rapid to distinguish individual shooters and all I can imagine is that whomever is being shot at with that stream of gunfire is going to be barely recognizable as a human when the bullets run out or the arm of the gun holder is too weak to fire.
That sound, that sound of death, destruction, endless, blackness, evil and blood. That sound of misery, hell, fury, anger and destruction. That noise, that horrible noise that does not make me feel protected or safe.
That noise makes me feel sick. It makes me feel afraid and alone. It makes me think that there is something horribly wrong with all of us on this planet. No one is exempt and we are all in it, in it together in this planet filled with oceans, clouds, birds, flowers, food, sunshine and rain. This wonderous place, our Earth, we walk on and live in its shelter and receive what we need to exist.
But we choose to rape 5-year-old girls, strap bombs to our bodies and blow up strangers, lay mines in fields our enemies gather food in, throw garbage out of our car windows into the gutters, leave the water running while we brush our teeth, use disposable dishes because we would rather take out the garbage then do dishes, deny our children food and beat them when we feel angry, burn the house down of a man who is black because he is married to someone who is white, pass laws denying the legal citizens of our own country the civil rights they legally are entitled to because they have a penis and fall in love with other people with penis’, refuse to pass laws governing gun control because it infringes on civil rights, require national standardized testing to measure school teachers and children’s academic progress but we won’t inspect a fertilizer plant that is right next door to an assisted living facility for the elderly since the 1980’s, men shoot their pregnant wives, young women are sold into slavery by their parents, children are kidnapped and tortured and killed, young men shoot and kill other young men over drugs and money, children in the riches country in the world go to bed hungry every night, mentally ill people are jailed and refused trials.
This beautiful Earth, filled with beautiful people making terribly violent choices.
What is wrong with all of us?
Not me, you think? Really? Not you?
I have been hearing and agreeing with the sentiment that the good people of our country out number the evil. That the good people of our country run toward danger to help those in need. I believe that and feel not everything in the world is bad when I see strangers reaching out to one another. I am afraid the bad people are so proactive. The bad people always have a plan. The bad people are so relentless and bent on hurting other people. The good people react well to the bad but what are we doing to stop the bad?
Certainly not passing laws and legislation that moves to keep certain guns out of anyone’s ownership. Certainly not assuring an equal quality education for all children. Certainly not providing mental healthcare for anyone in need. Certainly not making citizens who immigrate here feel welcome and needed, certainly not conserving our resources, certainly not feeding all the hungry people.
What is wrong with all of us?