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Full up

November 21, 2012

We all carry around this basket of stuff. Sometimes we carry it on our head full of thoughts and plans and ideas. Sometimes we carry in front of our chest full of love, friendship, hopefulness and fear. Sometimes its just swinging in our hand by our side hoping to catch something great or drop something too burdensome to carry any longer.

If we are lucky we sit down and examine our baskets from time to time remembering things we stuffed in their for use later. The end of another year is a time that I take my basket and sit it down and paw through it like a kid looking for their homework in a dirty bookbag.

I know something good is in there. There must be. I am certain I put all those good intentions to use and have the receipts somewhere to prove it but I just can’t get past all the trash and debris I have stuffed in here as well.

This year I plan to remove the space I have in my basket for self-doubt so there can be more room for reflection and appreciation for myself. I will throw away the feelings of regret because I can always do something else to change my fate. I will get rid of jealousy and be thankful for what I have.

Being empty of all that is negative and overwhelming makes my basket pretty empty. My heart is pretty empty. My head is pretty empty. My arms feel light and free from the heavy load.

I can fill my basket with love from you. Jokes that make me pee myself laughing. Tears of happiness at the overwhelming success of my children. The love my partner in crime gives me on the days I deserve it least. The affection I have for myself so that I can share it with other people.

I am full up and for that, am thankful.

*this message brought to you by The Letter T (thankful), procrastination cleaning my house and grant writing, bad dreams and too much documentary film watching. I would like to thank the Academy for their support. Can I drink wine in the morning?

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