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More than I could imagine

June 8, 2012

It’s not perfect but its mine. It’s not exactly as I would have thought it would turn out but it’s just fine. It’s strange how much time has passed and how many things have happened and not all for the better.

But its this life I have made and it seems to suit me just fine.

I met a boy who still had braces because his best friend pawned me off on him one night and then ignored me. I thought for sure I was older. I was not. I thought for sure his family must have owned the bar because there was no way he was legal to be there and he was really good at pool. He still wears a baseball hat too often but doesn’t wear the blue wool one that he painted an emblem on. He was skinny and his thighs were much smaller than mine. So was his waist. He had a strange red bleb on his collar-bone and I worried when he had it removed. He drank a lot and once peed on his alarm clock. The one of the first nights we spent together I woke up with my period and without difficulty or embarrassment he went and bought me tampons because the practical thing he is he stated “why would I be embarrassed, clearly they are not for me.” He was also never embarrassed about buying condoms because he said, “It means I am having SEX!”.

He is kind-hearted, funny, talented, can fix anything and loves me-no matter how crazy I am.

He is messy and never closes cupboards and drawers and has unfortunately taught the children to do the same much like we had that old cat Floydd who peed everywhere and he taught Lucy who then taught Frances. But he also teaches them how to paint and draw. How to use the big french knife to cut food for dinner. How to build a fire and use a pocket knife. How to fix a bike chain and throw a frisbee. He teaches them that men hug and kiss small children and is the softest touch-they know who to ask when they want a yes.

He puts up with my crap sometimes out of laziness to do something else and sometimes it’s because it’s the right thing to do. He knows when to argue with me and how to say he is sorry. He accepts my apology and is forgiving.

We have both learned the grass isn’t greener and you still have to mow it.

We have an amazing family and terrific children and love them together, for better and worse, in sickness and in health and it seems that now we are closer-to death us do part.

It’s more than I could imagine; it’s better because it really feels like mine.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Amy Lichner permalink
    June 11, 2012 11:21 pm

    Lovingly put…pure and simple just as it is complicated and hard. Congrats on your anniversary.

    Amy (of the mo mamie variety)

  2. June 17, 2012 2:01 am

    oh mamie. I loves you. Like a love song baby, I, I, I love you like a love song baaaabbeeee.
    I have leftover sparkling wine, you should come here and drink it with me

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