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Food, liquor, sleep and money

January 6, 2012

When you think about the things you like when you are an adult the list is pretty narrow. I remember when I was 10 years old the list of things I liked was so long maybe because you are just figuring it out-what you like and hate and tolerate.

We are having a party tomorrow and I am getting really excited about all the yummy food I am making and the delicious cocktails I am planning to make. Its going to be super fun. And I have a really slutty dress to wear with black ruffled rumba panties underneath thanks to my amazing girlfriend who knows I covet a particular pair of black rumba panties which are my facebook picture more often than not.

Well, she didn’t buy me these panties but arent’ they perfect? Le sigh. Le pant. Le, I digress.

I feel as I get older I need less and less to survive and that is a good feeling. We don’t accumulate debt the way some people do so we can just work a little bit and we are all fine. We have two fairly manageable children and while we would both like a bigger family our age, the responsiblity and cost of another baby just outweigh the benefits and we own the stuff we have like our car and house (small mortgage on the house, very small).

My list rotates as to which is at the top. Sleep is at the top after several 13-14 hour shifts at the hospital and as I am getting money for that -that desire is fulfilled. When I don’t work I like to have a glass of wine and eat food at my leisure. My life is pretty great.

Subsets of desire also contain sex, laughing and showering.

I thought my life would get more and more complicated the older I got-at least that is how it seemed to me when I was little and watched my mom and dad spin out their lives. Maybe its more simple because I have managed to stay hitched to the same wonderful/annoying/silly/talented/frustrating man for 20 goddamned years this June. 20 fucking years. HOLYSHIT. I am hyperventilating with how long that is and how old that makes me. Its giving me the vapors.

Fringe benefits I enjoy that have come from this amazing life are listening to my children talk to each other and listening to their stories, smelling their heads (why do they still smell so delicious to me?), squeezing them and kissing their necks, watching them do amazing things and catching them being compassionate and polite. All of that makes me happy. So happy that I clap my hands a lot. YAYAYAY.

I have amazing friends who hold my hand, tell me to just stop it already, kiss me, tell me I am pretty, listen to my crazy shit and help me be okay-you know, in this grown up world that is so narrow and finite.

When I was little I thought that the world just got bigger and bigger as you got older and older and I find my world narrowing to a few basic things-lucky for me.

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