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The last one

July 23, 2008

It was funny because it wasn’t a pick up line. That is what made it romantic, how you didn’t really know how to be suave and that part of you is endearing. I am pawned off to you, in a way, from some other boy whom I get the impression from that he wishes I would just disappear from town since it is so small and we can’t help but run into each other. So, under the lights above the pool table and underneath the shadow of your ever present baseball hat your braces glitter at me and I think to myself-your dad must own this place because you look about 15 years old. It turns out you are a year older than I am and are 22, finishing your 5th year of college due to a major change from illustration to fine art. It turns out your dad does own this bar which is funny because I had part of it right. You get your braces off in a week and when I ask you why on earth would you get braces at 20 years old you said, well, my parents paid for it, why not have straight teeth?

We talk about art as we play pool and I am still pretty good. I see Paul, my first friend in Provincetown and god-bless him. He is just nice in a dude type of way and has always been a friend. still is. That other boy I had been seeing leaves I think or just disappears because you and I are talking.

You say to me that you have some paintings at your place and do I want to come see them? I think to myself, Did he just ask me if I wanted to come up and see his etchings? We walk back to your place and its empty and just as we start climbing the stairs you say, “Shit, I forgot, we don’t have any electricity.” I say, “Oh. Do your paintings glow in the dark or something?” You say, “I have a flashlight?” and indeed you do have a flashlight. After we inspect your paintings with a flashlight we sit on the couch talking about all those things that you talk about with someone when you begin to fall for them. Slowly, bit by bit we start holding hands in the dark while we talk for hours. I leave without a kiss goodnight but we hang out a couple more times at the bar before you ask me on a proper date.

We go to the movies in town and see A Night On Earth. Its a magical movie and we hold hands the whole time. Its June 8, 1992. Maybe a month or so later we sleep together and are then inseparable. You have this party where you and your childhood best friend and current roommate whom had dumped me as you picked me up drink about 4 gallons of monster punch and that night after we go to sleep after Jacob finally leaves your apartment you wake up and try to take a dump on the end of the bed. When I kick you you choose to instead, after cussing at me, to whiz all over your alarm clock. I gather my clothes, leave my shoes and leave you to later harass your roommate in an uncharacteristic fashion. The next morning you show up at my door with 3 bunches of daisies and they are my favorite flower. You are blank and confused and clueless and don’t know why you woke up and I am gone and Seth won’t talk to you. Its kind of cute, if blackouts can be cute.

The summer wears on and we go swimming, go the ponds, work, go to dinner, sleep late, kiss with sand on our lips and fall in love. Over dinner one night at Howard’s restaurants while I eat real MD crabcakes because Howard was from Baltimore I tell you that its been great but I am trying to get a job on another boat and maybe you can visit me on spring break if I am in the Caribbean?

You start to cry and we have to leave. Along the pier we walk and talk and finally after you try to tell me how I have to move to Boston or stay in MA somehow I tell you out of desperation because I am sure this statement will settle you down and make you come to your senses and forget me, “Well, then the only way I would ever move to a new city with no job, no friends, no money is if I could live with you.” I wait for the curtain to drop and for you to say, okay then, nice knowing you!

You blink at me and say, “Okay.”

I say, “Okay?” and then, “Are you serious? You want me to move in with you?” and then, “I would be living with you.”

You say, “I know.”

So we both say okay. We will give it a try for six months and then reevaluate our situation.

Sixteen years later we are still evaluating. You are still an artist. I never went back on to any boat. We eventually got married. Bought 3 houses. Moved a million times. Traveled to many places together. Bought our first car that each of us ever paid for. Started IRA’s. Had two children. Grown wrinkles. Lost some hair. Grown our waistlines. Bought art.Decorated our houses. Cooked many meals. Fought. Cried. Lost people. Found some. And we are still looking for ourselves and hopefully we will find them together.

8 Comments leave one →
  1. Tyson Koska permalink
    July 23, 2008 2:42 pm

    Wow… awesome…

    Some favorite lines:

    underneath the shadow of your ever present baseball hat your braces glitter at me

    Its kind of cute, if blackouts can be cute.

    …we go swimming, go to ponds, work, go to dinner, sleep late, kiss with sand on our lips and fall in love.

  2. tracyann permalink
    July 23, 2008 3:31 pm

    i almost cried, beautiful

  3. July 23, 2008 5:27 pm

    Love this, Cole. Just love it. 🙂

  4. gina permalink
    July 24, 2008 2:24 am

    really lovely.
    i love how he cried when you told him you were leaving.

  5. July 24, 2008 1:19 pm

    Speachless….always thanks for sharing.

  6. donna permalink
    July 28, 2008 12:34 am

    Love you both! (he still could pass for 15!)

  7. July 29, 2008 3:53 am

    The best for last, eh?

    I love this.

  8. July 29, 2008 6:43 am

    Though pissing on the alarm clock does do the job, I’ve always found the snooze button to be somewhat less messy.

    Thanks, both of you, for a super-fun party. We had a great time.


    PS This post was all kinds of sweet.

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