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Obsessed with vaginas

March 12, 2008

So Chica is on the couch, “reading” some notes I am discarding from this semesters psych rotation and says to me, in her most professory voice,

“Okay, now you pick one for your test, A baby comes out of your vagina or what? Which one?” She asks impatiently.

Mama responds with confidence cause OB/Maternal-Newborn was last semester, “Vagina, definitely vagina.”

Chica continues to read her papers and then says, “Okay. Good. Now when the baby is coming out of the vagina are you in a hospital or at home?” She is tapping her finger impatiently on her imaginary test.

“Well, home because pregnant people are not sick, they are just having a baby. Unless they need something special to help the mother or baby. Home, definitely at home.” I see Chica frowning at me.

“Well,  you know that if the baby comes out of your vagina if it is at home it might just fly out and fly around and would bump its butt. THEN it would say, Macaroni and Cheezzzzeeeeeeeee!”

Maniacal laughter ensues from Chica. I am not sure what to say or how to respond so I say, “Um, can you go tell that to Daddy-O?”

I hear a muffled translation and then D yells to me from the other room, “What the hell does that mean?”

Excellent question.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. March 12, 2008 5:46 pm

    Sophie never passes up an opportunity to let me know when I’m exiting the shower that I have boobs and nipples yet she only has nipples. Sometimes I think this open honest approach to the life sciences may come back to bite me in the ass. But damn, I love these stories!!!!

  2. March 14, 2008 11:28 pm

    Babies have in fact been known to fly out of vaginas and bump their butts. That’s why hospitals are so much safer. Ob-Gyn’s say that to their patients all the time.

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