Zombies pee on my stairs: More details at 11…

Spawn has been sick for a weekish now and today spiked a 105.4 fever for a while. His fever would not really come down with Motrin and his little heart was racing and he seemed miserable. After tag-teaming the computer world for info as to what it could be, thanks to Debbi, who was not drunk to my knowledge (see, you are not always drunk in my postings!) we both feared it could be Measles or Fifths Disease or Pneumonia. I am leaning more toward flu now but I will feel better when it is the light of day tomorrow and the boys fever has continued to stay away. I learned that you can give both Tylenol and Motril alternately and it is sometimes more effective for stubborn fevers that seem to be causing a lot of discomfort. I am not usually freaked out by fevers unless my child really seems ill even when the fever is coming down. A fever rarely goes over 106 F due to internal temperature regulators in your hypothalamus and it has to be about 107 to be actually causing damage and fevers are good. They make you feel bad but otherwise are a healthy response. Knowing all of that, believing all of that in my brain was not as helpful as you might think. Luckily the boy was sleepy and we put him to bed around 8ish and he seemed cooler. I let him fall asleep and took his temp and it was down to 101.3 and he seemed a bit sweaty and I had hopes it was finally breaking.

It did break and he was cool as a cucumber and sleeping mostly peacefully although he is very congested and his cough sounds horrid. I finally settled into studying for my HUGE exam tomorrow and I hear little feet shuffling upstairs. I get up to go up to get him or his sister and I see Spawn on the stairs. His eyes are open but no one is home. I ask him if he is okay and he doesn’t even look at me. He is just holding his penis and staring off glassy-eyed. I feel him and he is cool for the first time all day. I ask him again if he is okay? Does he feel sick? Is he gonna throw up? Do you need a drink?

And then all of a sudden on the stairs without pulling his pj’s down, he pees. On his slippers down his pants leg. I summon D because now I am freaked. He seems so out of it and won’t answer me and peeing on his own foot did nothing to rouse him. I am shaking him and he still won’t answer. I say, “I AM GOING TO TAKE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL IF YOU DON’T ANSWER ME NOW!!!!!!!!!!” Still nothing. Finally I sit him down on the stairs and he says, “HEY.”. We strip him and take him back to bed and he falls instantly, I mean truly instantly asleep. Still cool and a bit sweaty.

Spawn did the stupidest thing I have ever seen him do this week at Debbi’s…he purposely put sand down the back of his pants, over and over and over again. NOW, just a few days later he has done the weirdest thing ever. Atleast it wasn’t in his bed. Or mine. I just changed my sheets!

I may need to set my alarm to do some bed checks on my zombie and make sure he doesn’t pee on his legos or books or anything I don’t want to clean up.

Seriously, I think my children have some weird innate ability to completely fuck me every single day before and exam. I have done minimal studying and am so distracted that Spawn may have pneumonia or measles or something CRAZY and it isn’t just the flu.

So, if I fail this test (less than a 75%) I will have them to blame. Which is convenient because I am feeling pretty stupid lately at school and this provides a convenient scape-goat.

“I am goat. In a moat. In a boat…..whoooooooooo’s got the crack?” The Mouldy Peaches

scroll down to the last post to enjoy the Moldy Peaches and the theme song to this post