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A log and some sand

March 29, 2007

My lovely and drunk friend Debbi was watching my two petri dishes of love this afternoon while I finished lecture and D went to work. I arrive and start telling them about the crazy people I had just dealt with and they told me of how my son had briefly, yet AGAIN lost his mind. Donna and Debbi tole me that all of a sudden they hear Eric crying. Donna goes outside to see why her baby is upset along with Debbi. Justin, Debbi’s son says, “Spawn threw a log at Eric” They question his accuracy but indeed Justin had not exaggerated and yes my son threw an actual log at Eric. They look at my son and notice a large red mark on his forehead. They inquire about his injury and he says that yes he threw the log but then he whacked himself in the head with a 2×4 in order to cheer Eric up. Apparently this is how you cheer someone up. It always makes me feel better when the children inflict harm on themselves voluntarily because I can not hurt them and I live vicariously through those moments. While they are retelling me the story I am watching my son play in the sand box with his two friends. I scream at him, “HEY, STOP IT! OH MY GOSH!!! HEY…STOP IT!” Donna and Debbi feel bad for my son for a second and think that I am yelling at him because of the past log incident. But no. I am not.

I see my son, standing by the edge of the sandbox, willfully and quickly scooping sand up in his palm and stuff it down the back of his pants! I would like to remind you that my son is 6. 6. 6 years old. Not six months. Debbi’s little 8 month old amoebas have more sense than that. I scream at him to come to me. He does and I tell him, “That is the dumbest thing I think I have ever seen you do. Have you lost your mind? Putting sand down your pants is the dumbest thing I have ever seen you do!”

To which he replies, “Seriously?”

2 Comments leave one →
  1. March 29, 2007 1:30 am

    Why am I always drunk in your posts? Ha!

    Woohoo Wine Wednesdays!

  2. donna permalink
    March 30, 2007 9:46 pm

    you have to admit, after the shock, it really was sort of funny. I love wine club.

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